Why We Shouldn't Hate Younger Women

There she was…Ms. Zero Percent body fat.

It's not that I have Jennifer Aniston's medical records, but must be a zero percent type in person.

Last Friday, the two of us were in a suite at the Waldorf Astoria Hotel in the Big Apple. Me: Frizzy hair from the New York rainy weather, damn it all to hell.

Her: Professionally coiffed to the max.

I can report to all of us midlifers that her new bob is the bomb. It's shoulder length with streaky blonde highlights and falls perfectly into place with each stride of her spiked Jimmy Choos.

In terms of hair, I'll definitely have what she's having.  

We haven't even gotten to what she was wearing. To die for! Imagine a steel gray Calvin Klein, body-melding skirt with a matching Tom Ford shirt that was sleeveless in a way that only someone with perfect sculpted shoulders should wear. Her arms are just as sinewy. Think ski slopes.

Don't hate her because she's beautiful…and younger. I interview these young babes almost every single day and usually walk out of their lavish hotel suites thinking one of three things:

• Wow, I've never seen someone wear sky blue suede pants and actually look thin.
• It's probably not legal to have hair that perfect.
• Is it possible to have the hips of a seventh grader and own a mansion in Malibu? Just wondering.

As for Jennifer Aniston, she has the Malibu pad, but she's also very sweet. So you can't hate her.

This brings up the topic: Why shouldn't we be jealous of younger women?

*You don't need an Act of Congress to enjoy simple pleasures.After my Aniston interview, I logged a little bit of time with teen sensation Selena Gomez last weekend. She spent part of the time talking about the calories in a deep-dish pizza that she was going to eat for lunch. She's 19.

At 19, she shouldn't be worried about it.

Midlifers know that you eat that piece of pizza and work it off the next day or eat a lot of salads. Whatever. It's not a big deal and we don't want to deny ourselves. We eat the pizza.

*You know what to avoid as a midlifer.If you're smart and pay attention, you know what to stay miles away from – when it comes to men, situations and experiences. We don't go out to drink to get drunk …..or worse.  Younger women might stay out on the town for nights on end and end up looking like used dishrags before they know it.

Midlifers know how to have fun, but then we love to collapse into our 5,000 thread count sheets. "When you're young, you feel like you can go and go," Michelle Pfeiffer tells me. "When you get a little older, you appreciate a good night's sleep and look amazing the next day."

*You know you don't have to look the same as you did at 20, but can enjoy great beauty.Look at Cindy Crawford or Helen Mirren or Annette Bening who are gorgeous at any age, but they don't look like their 20-year-old pictures. They even look better. Younger girls are still trying to figure out how to wear those shorty-short jean shorts and pull off that post college look because it has suddenly dawned on them that time is passing. Why not celebrate what's beautiful for your age. I've never seen anyone more gorgeous than Catherine Zeta-Jones who in person can make jeans and a man's white shirt look like haute couture.

*When you're over 40, you don't have to wear stilettos to the supermarket.Sure, you can take out a pair of Manolos (now that you can afford them) and go out on the town, but you don't have to be like the younger actresses to run to Whole Foods for them. Midlifers know a good wedge shoe can look like high heels without the pain. We can wear black flats and think, "If it's good enough for Audrey Hepburn, it's good enough for me."

*When you're a little older, you believe the warnings out there.Younger women still think it's okay to smoke and tan – even in moderation. It's not. Even in moderation.

*You can simplify your beauty routine with age.Midlifers have bathrooms that look like a cosmetics counter at Macy's or Nordies. We've been rooked into buying every de-aging cream and serum and we know what works – and what's just a fancy lotion. We even visit our docs for medical grade skincare products. By the way, Aniston even practices cheap beauty tips. "Neutrogena soap has always worked for me. I also love the lavender body scrub from Trader Joe's," Aniston told me. The point is you learn that with age you don't need $300 facial creams. You can go back to basics and have the same effect because who wants to waste money.  

*Age brings confidence.  Maybe Jennifer has reached it. "Absolutely, I'm more confident now," she says. "I'm absolutely more comfortable in my body as I get older. In my 20s, I was so awkward and uncomfortable."

" I think I'm doing good for 60," she teases. (She's actually not there..yet.) 

The point here is so many of us let our spirits sink when we see someone a little bit younger with it ALL together. We tend to give up thinking, "Oh, but she's got youth on her side."

What if we turned it around and thought: I have experience, smarts, and I still look pretty damn good. Plus, I could go out and buy that bar of Neutrogena soap and soak in a tub every night. I don't even have young kids bugging me to get out.

I have no problem smelling like lavender.

As for the body issues, we know what to do. And we often have the time to do it because we're not racing around trying to establish careers and families. We've already established them.

And remember, there is always Spanx.

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