Dear Kiss & Zutell—

You're so vain…Yes, that's you I'm talking about if you're a man at midlife who's thinking you might need a little professional help to keep looking young. According to a report released yesterday by the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, men underwent more than 1.1 million cosmetic procedures in 2010, up 2 percent over 2009 despite the recession.

Some procedures were especially popular, the report said. Facelifts for men were up 14 percent and male liposuction rose 7 percent.

So here I sit — two weeks out from my body lift surgery, still in my pajamas and housebound — wondering where to start to describe what it feels like to have a body lift.

Does it hurt? Well, at this point it's mostly just really uncomfortable, but the first few days were intense. Really, really intense. Like cried-the-first-time-I-tried-to-get-out of-bed-at-the-hospital intense. But, like most things in life, that painful part passed and every day got a little easier.

One thing you should know, should you ever venture down the weight loss surgery path like I did two years ago, is that the after effects of losing a lot of weight are not so pretty.

I mean, it's a great thing that I decided to do and I'd do it again in a heartbeat (gastric bypass, in case you were wondering.)

But having lots of saggy skin that no amount of dieting or sit-ups (OK, I don't actually do sit-ups, but you know what I mean) will get rid of are not pretty.

Which led me to plastic surgery.